Project Sabertooth : The Training of Zaraki Kenpachi!
by Vermillion Star
Summary: Central 46 wants the rehabilitation of Gotei 13 not only in strength but also in terms of social graces. Unfortunately, they zeroed in with Zaraki. Now, the bloodthirsty captain has to learn stuff that ranges from basic social dances up to formal tea ceremonies. Will he pull through it all?
1. Chapter 1 - The Sabertooth Brief

**Author's Note: **The plot line is within the 17-month post-time skip after Aizen's defeat. Many things may have happened at Soul Society during this time that we do not know of. This story is one of those :P

**Warning**: OOC. Don't complain.

'

* * *

**Chapter 1: The Sabertooth Brief**

**'**

* * *

A view of rolling hills punctuated with the spectacular vision of idly drifting clouds on azure sky. Mesmerizing display of splendidly dancing verdant leaves of trees in response to the rhythm of the balmy breeze scented with fresh spring flowers. An enthralling resonance fashioned by ensemble of the low-murmuring brook and cadence of happily prancing little birds.

Captain Kenpachi Zaraki is deeply immersed in the serene beauty of the surroundings and tranquility of the moment. It is such a wonderful day. His mind generously lingered with childlike delight at the recollection of his recent battle with the 5th Espada Nnoitra. The intoxicating bitter-sweetness of their blood soaked fight left a thrilling aftertaste in his entirety. It was a fight that made him lust for more. He smirked at the thought of his next target battle playmates, either the arrogant Byakuya or stubborn Ichigo.

The black sheep of the Gotei 13 family lazily stretched his sprawled figure on the soft ground. The lush grasses that cushion him were crushed by his massive frame. He let out a huge yawn. Such bliss! What else could spoil a perfect day like this?

Ahem! What else? Hell Butterfly.

The aggressive top-brass of Squad 11 sluggishly got up. An emergency meeting was called in order by the strongest man in Seireitei - - Captain Commander Genryuusai Yamamoto.

'

* * *

Kenpachi must hurry to reach Squad 1's station in time for the meeting. Without the comic guidance of his equally sense-of-direction-challenged vice-captain, he must decide for himself the fastest means and correct route. Well, fastest way? He possesses speed expected from a captain. Correct route? THAT is a huge problem.

The battle-frenzy captain stood up and ran towards his perceived correct track, but after covering some distance, he can no longer discern which way to go. He decided to take his chance and took a right, and then a left, and then four ways straight on, and then another right and another right, and then 2 more ways straight on and then finally a left.

Okay. It is official. He was lost.

'

* * *

The long short of it, Kenpachi arrived at the meeting room before the final agenda is about to be ended.

All eyes were on him as he boldly strode inside the assembly hall. He stood beside the smiling reinstated blond-haired captain of Squad 5, Shinji Hirako. Actually, almost everyone is smiling at him. As usual, the exceptions are the humorless, vertically-challenged Toshiro and the emotionless, pride-obsessed Byakuya.

"What did I miss?" Kenpachi casually addressed the group with his normal growling-tone. He did offer neither apologies nor excuses for being disastrously late. In return, no one from the assembled captains bothered to ask. Surprisingly, neither the Soutaichou scolded nor reprimanded him.

Yamamoto calmly cleared his throat. His eyes remained closed. His eyelids provided the curtains to successfully hide the fierceness and commanding gaze of his red eyes

"Central 46's directive" the authoritative voice of the founder of Gotei 13 pierce the unbearably quiet but humor-laden atmosphere.

Kenpachi looked around the faces of his comrades. Each of them hides an amused expression. _Something interesting must've come up earlier_, he thought to himself. Even though Toshiro and Byakuya do not look happily amused, each concealed an air of dark, wicked humor that is desperately trying to surface.

"Heh, that's interesting Old Man Yama" the fighting machine of Soul Society quipped.

Alarmingly, Yamamoto did not display any displeasure on how he was addressed by Kenpachi. Instead, he continued to explain the matter at hand. He seems not to mind repeating what have already been discussed earlier.

"Interesting, indeed." The commander general briefly paused then continued. "It has been decided by Central 46 that development and rehabilitation of Gotei 13 is highly required not only terms of strength…" the Soutaichou's eyes opened to lock-up with Kenpachi's gaze, "…but also the observance of proper decorum" the old man lifted his chin up a little higher. The simple gesture seemed to drag the presence of his authority to a notch higher – and scarier.

"Kenpachi Zaraki, captain of Squad 11" Yamamoto formally addressed his subordinate. "By order of Central 46, you shall undergo extensive training to polish your emotional and social bearing." The directive fell like a death sentence to Kenpachi.

"What training?" Kenpachi's tone demanded for more explanation. Central 46 is not an entity that he would defy head-on. He knew he has to comply but what does he needs to do?

"You don't understand? Your intelligence has serious problems, too" Byakuya flatly remarked.

Kenpachi could swear to high heavens that tinge of a discreet malevolent delight momentarily betray the icy façade of the noble when he spoke. Just for this moment alone, he decided not pay attention to his arch nemesis. He is dying to know what Central 46 wants with him.

'We will assist you to accomplish Central 46's order" the gentle captain of Squad 4 softly chimed in. " We have prepared several lessons and corresponding mentors to provide guidance." Retsu Unohana tenderly explained. Coupled with a saccharine smile, she directly look into Kenpachi's eyes and asked " Do you have any issues with that?"

Alright. Perfect. Wow. Central 46. Genryuusai Yamamoto. Retsu Unohana. These are the perfect ingredients to spice up his perfect day.

Without batting an eyelash, the battle-loving captain replied to Retsu, "No. Now, what do I have to do?"

'

* * *

'What kind of joke is this?" Kenpachi bellowed as he read the prospectus. He tore the paper and tossed it away at the open window. He is completely livid for being singled out by Central 46. _Why me? Why the hell me? Why, why, WHY!_ He asked non-stop to himself.

"C'mon, it is not so bad" the pony-tailed captain of Squad 8, Shunsui Kyoraku said. He gulped down a shot of sake before continuing. "We will start with the basic ones." He lies sideways atop the tatami mat with his head propped up by his left arm. His flowery kimono is loosely draped over his captain's uniform.

"No one has to know about these lessons of yours. These will be kept amongst those directly involved only, mentors and you." Ukitake Jushiro, the 13th Squad captain assured the now emotionally embattled big man of Squad 11. He is the most diplomatic among all the captains of Gotei 13.

Kenpachi sighed heavily. _Dammit. I've no choice._ He understands that there is no other way to get out of this but to play along. He does not care at all even if Seireitei Chronicles decide to run a full front page report of his _training_. Right now, what he wants is wring the neck of each of the idiots at Central 46. Honestly, he would rather be in the middle of a killing field rather than doing what was on the list.

"When do we start?" Kenpachi finally surrendered.

"Tomorrow" Jushiro smilingly replied.

"Again... what's Lesson 1?"

"Posture and Proper Dress Code" the white-haired captain answered. Central 46 won. Project Sabertooth is about to begin.

_Just great_, Kenpachi inwardly groaned as he stood up and strode towards the door.

"Leaving?" Shunsui's seeking confirmation of Kenpachi's gesture.

"Yeah. I am going to borrow Kuchiki-hime's ball gown" Kenpachi irritatingly answered and disappeared.

* * *

**Additional Note:** The taming of wild-boy Kenpachi starts next. Feel free to post your feedback. thanks :)


	2. Chapter 2 - Lesson 1

**CHAPTER 2**

**Lesson 1: Dress Code and Proper Posture**

**'**

* * *

The entire compound of Squad 11 suddenly went silent. The gentlest breath of the late spring breeze sounded like howling wind of a tornado against the stillness. For a moment, the entire army of the rowdy and boorish division of Gotei 13 stood like quiet tombstones in a cemetery. The only difference between the unmoving shinigamis and the stones is the shihakusho. Stones don't wear one.

Everyone ogled at the newly arrived Kenpachi. Even the dumbest of the dumb can easily detect the changes.

The bloodthirsty leader of Seireitei's battle division stepped in an immaculately starched and newly tailored captain's haori. It was sleeveless with the usual lining of deep purple. The back was of embroidered black thread formed in a rhombus, Gotei 13's symbol . Inside this insignia was Kenpachi's squad number. His old, ragged haori with jagged ends is gone.

Kenpachi's brisk stride diffuses an air of strong but placid authority. He radiates with splendor of a truly magnificent warrior.

It is confirmed. There is strange power in clothing.

'

* * *

**At Squad 13.**

"Who knows that Kenpachi would be easier to be dressed up than a frisky toddler?" the reinstated blond captain of Squad 3 smilingly said as he poured tea onto the three empty cups. Rose Otoribashi handed the first one to the sickly white-haired captain of Squad 13. The next one, he offered to Shunsui, Eight's top brass.

"Hahahaha" Shunsui laughed mirthfully. "Not much of a complain either. I think catching up a fish alive is harder than dressing up a compliant Kenpachi"

"All thanks to Byakuya, you said?" Ukitake disbelievingly inquired. At times like this, he definitely dislikes his frail health. He missed history unfolded before his very eyes.

'

* * *

**_Flashback. Rose, Shunsui, Byakuya, Yumichika, Kenpachi._**

The big man of Squad 11 paced back and forth across the room. His face is a mask of a wild animal made to be a household pet, a slavering ball of caged fury. He is temperamentally a poor fit in what Central 46 deemed to be an officer and a gentleman of Gotei 13.

"Oi, Kenpachi. Judging by the time spent pacing, you could have travelled around the walls of Seireitei more than three times" the man wearing a lady's pink floral kimono draped over the captain's haori called from his spot on the floor. He had been idly watching the brusque captain of Squad 11 for some time now. Captain Shunsui is evidently enjoying the scene.

"Captain Zaraki, you could easily breeze through this" Yumichika brazenly assured his immediate superior. "What you are about to do is nothing more than changing into a new set of clothes and a bit of personality development". The 5th seat of Eleventh was ordered to accompany his captain throughout the personality transformation errr… development program. Given Yumichika's love for aesthetics, no other from 11th squad would qualify for the role.

"A bit?" Byakuya spoke with skepticism. "Seems like an overhaul of everything" he continued. He is sitting on a chair beside a window that provides a scenic view of the outer lying lush garden of Squad 8. He sips on a cup of tea in a manner that only a noble like him can pull through. Casual yet elegant.

Kenpachi glared at the noble. His reiatsu is no doubt at its peak, shrouded completely with murderous intent. "How about a fight to the death, right here, right now, Princess Kuchiki?" Kenpachi challenged the raven-haired captain of Sixth Squad.

"A nervous wreck such as you dares to challenge me?" Byakuya's words were equally wrapped in venom.

"Nervous? Who do you think you're talking to?"

"Is it not too obvious to which I am speaking with or are you really that dense?"

"Dense? Should not be the case for you? Or did your girly-bitchy instinct kick-in at the precise moment that made you ran here just to see how will I be dressed up?" a small smirk is curled at the end of Kenpachi's mouth. "Are you that jealous my lovely little princess?"

"Excuse me but it was not my choice to be here. I am ordered to help tame a wild beast" Byakuya's keeping his cool in check despite Kenpachi's disrespect of his gender. He is far too refined to fall for such cheap mockery.

"Whoa! A prissy, sissy, pretty girly to tame a beastie!" Kenpachi growled in a rather awkward sing-song manner. "You are reading so much fairy tales. Get real, shitty princess!"

"Clearly, your potty personality needs more than polishing. You are better off to the graveyard"

"I would LOVE that! Death and grave are far better combination than your hellish idea of manner and fashion"

"Oh so you are afraid of getting dressed up properly? I bet you are also frightened to learn some manners? Is it because of your tiny brain not capable of handling such simple instructions?" Byakuya's tone is laced with profound depth of sarcasm.

"I ain't afraid of anything!"

As if in a cue, the blond captain of Third entered the room which momentarily interrupted the heated argument between Byakuya and Kenpachi. At Rose's left hand is a set of crisp and newly tailored captain's uniform. While a big hardbound book is clutched on his right hand.

"Just in time" Shunsui gleefully announced upon seeing the new entrant. He lazily stood up from his reclined position. He walked toward Rose to grab the new set of uniforms from his comrade of old time, dating back to more than a couple of century back.

Likewise, Yumichika sighed from relief of not seeing bloodbath between Byakuya and Zaraki over some trivial issues. He had been listening intently from the corner of the room. His back propped at the wall.

Rose and Shunsui moved over to the table where Byakuya was seated. Each captain pulled a chair to plop themselves in.

Rose laid the big book on the table. "Are you not going to sit here with us? I don't think it would be comfortable to discuss today's lesson whilst you are towering over us" he then motioned Kenpachi to sit on the empty chair between him and Shunsui.

"You know what?" Kenpachi growled through clenched teeth. "I'd rather die than to take part with this Central 46 crap"

"I agree" Byakuya emotionlessly declared in favor of his arch nemesis. "Kenpachi Zaraki is better off dead. I can take care of it. How would like me to end your life, quick or slow?" The icy noble addressed the Eleventh captain.

"I won't go down without a fight, bastard"

"Oh, I see. How about you start eating the pages of the book since you couldn't read them anyway? Who knows you might die from choking" a discreet contempt is behind Byakuya's soft tone.

"How about I shove that book up your ass?"

"Why not hang yourself using the new haori?"

"How about I strangle you with your beloved scarf?

"Why not stab your neck with your stiff hair spikes?

"How about I nail you at the remaining Sōkyoku's stand using your kenseikan?'

"Why not allow yourself to euthanasia which I would gladly facilitate?"

"Alright…alright" the cooler head of Shunsui intervened. "Kenpachi…how about try putting on your newly arrived uniform?" his voice sounded like a father coaxing a little child

"No way, in hell I am going to replace what I am wearing!"The barbarian of Gotei 13 nonchalantly declared.

"I agree" Byakuya once again took Kenpachi's side of the argument.

Both Rose and Shunsui looked at the noble heir with incredulity. Yumichika slightly stirred from his position. Kenpachi suspiciously glared at his 'pretty princess'. Four pair of eyes waited in anticipation of what he is about to say.

"You see" Byakuya answered. "Even if you put a garment of gold to a monkey, the monkey will always be a monkey. It will never ever change a monkey to a human"

"Dammit it, Kuchiki!" Kenpachi growled. "What are you trying to do?

"I am helping to highlight your points"

"You're putting me in a bad light"

"You should be grateful that I am extending a hand for a fool like you!"

"I do not need your help!"

"Yes, you do. I can explain to everyone in a civilized manner how frightened you are with putting on decent clothes. Likewise, I have the credibility for all to hear my assessment of your incapability to learn and follow simple instructions." Byakuya lengthily explained.

"What the hell? I am not afraid of anything neither I am mentally incapable!" Kenpachi defended himself.

"Tch! Prove it, Kenpachi Zaraki"

The burly man wearing customary hair spikes angrily slumped himself on the empty chair he was beckoned to occupy earlier. Likewise, he furiously snatched the newly arrived sets of uniform from Shunsui's hands whilst heatedly glaring at the book Rose had placed on top of the table.

"Game on, Kuchiki Byakuya!"

'

* * *

**Author's Note:** See how easy for Byakuya to convince Kenpachi? :P ... More to come!


	3. Chapter 3 - Art Of Speech

**A/N : OOC.**

* * *

**CHAPTER 3**

**Lesson 2 : Art of Speeches and Presentations**

**'**

* * *

"Clothes and manner does not entirely make a man. Although they help to make an initial impression, there is another aspect that needs to be considered to becoming a gentleman" Jushiro Ukitake briefly paused from his lecture. He exchanged meaningful glances with his pal, Shunsui.

"Are you still with us?" Jushiro asked Kenpachi whose aura screams of entire boredom.

"Uh-uhm" the mean machine of Gotei 13 curtly replied. His facial expressions clearly say he is midway between reality and dreamland. It seems a fight between staying awake and getting sleep is ongoing. To the dismay of the two mentors, dreamland is a stone throw away from Kenpachi.

"That's great!" Shunsui exclaimed. "Probably we should put into action all the things we have discussed over the last 4 days." He winked at Jushiro.

"Action?" the head of the battle division sleepily asked.

"Yes, practice. Sort of dry run with guest mentors, both face to face and in a podium" Shunsui explained.

"No way in hell I will do any of that!" Kenpachi's now fully alert. "What's this? A drama class? You wish me to participate in scripted practice?"

"That is the only way to validate your learning before the practical exam" the captain of Thirteenth explained. "Yama-jii would want to see your progress with the lessons."

"Practical what?"

"Exam" Jushiro calmly sustained the query.

"Hell, no!"

"Yes"

"I'd rather be dead than to participate with your mock drill"

"Great. How about I kill you now?" Byakuya volunteered. He entered the room with impassive face. His strides are long but unhurried, his manner unreadable but speaks volume. Behind him is Yumichika, another ever present pageantry assistant to Kenpachi.

"You … again!" Kenpachi bellowed. No doubt about it. The battle loving persona is now widely awake. _Why is this arrogant bastard always around?_ He hatefully looked at the newly arrived noble.

The other occupants of the room quietly watched the unfolding scene between the night and day of Gotei 13. Unfortunately, their horizons only meet at the tip of their swords.

"How do you teach a monkey to talk? Would anyone explain how a mongrel can be presented as a wolf?" Byakuya's barrage of questions floated across the room which does not expect any answer.

"It is the same as a spoiled, domestic cat that believed the reflection on the mirror he sees is of a vicious lion. In fact, he is nothing but a pampered little fur ball with bells hanging around the neck." Likewise, Kenpachi is staring at nothingness, talking to no one.

"Oh, I see. So you learned few new tricks" Byakuya elegantly raised an eyebrow as he directed his words towards his BFF that is, best-fiend-forever. Take note that it only takes one letter to convert a friend into a foe. "Similes and metaphors had been added to your vocabulary bank. Captain Ukitake and Captain Kyoraku must have worked hard to drill them into your small brain"

"Hell, yeah! I wonder how many hours of cuddling from your slave tutors took before you learnt your graceful tricks"

"The tricks you called are fit for beasts like you. Human call it manners"

"What difference does it makes? Play dead, roll, and sit as told are no different from having an icy mask, numbered pace and stiff-ass on the chair!"

"Excuse me, but shall we go back to the topic here?" the free-spirited Shunshui broke the word-war between the yin-yang of Soul Society. He knew that if he does not interfere now, the spat would take forever.

"My apologies, Captain Kyoraku. Please go ahead with your lecture" the young heir motioned the older man to continue whilst he regally seated himself on a chair.

"Don't expect me to apologize" Kenpachi snapped to no one in particular. He roughly pulled an empty chair away from where Byakuya was seated. He dragged it all the way to a small corner table. "Yumichika, take this away" he ordered his 5th seat to remove the decorative white and gold vase filled with spring flowers. Then, he propped up his feet onto the table whilst maintaining a reclined position in the awfully treated piece of furniture.

"Shall we go back to the lessons Rose and Byakuya presented last week?" the mild-manner captain of Thirteenth asked the so-called barbarian._ I wonder how long would it take for Kenpachi to understand the second set of instructions._ He noted that basic posture and dress manner took a week. It will be of no surprise if this part of the program will take twice, thrice or eternity long?

The spiky-haired captain of Eleventh grudgingly lifted his feet off the table. His arms that lazily supported his head were instead re-positioned in front of his chest. He straightened his spine against the chair. "There" Kenpachi retorted. "Happy?"

"Not really" the smiling Jushiro replied. "I will be happier if you will uncross your arms and rest them instead on the chair's armrest"

Kenpachi audibly sighed. Nonetheless, he obliged. Definitely, he does not want to go back to Lesson 1 and spend an eternity-like moments with frilly-dressed Rose neither with prideful Byakuya. He is too mortified at the thoughts of doing another series of 'catwalks' and 'dress rehearsals'.

Jushiro approvingly nod. "Now, you look more willing to accept ideas. Earlier, when your arms were crossed, it implied an invisible defensive shield, blocking any outside influence." His patience is deep just like Byakuya's. However, the raven-haired captain of Sixth possessed a patience borne out of extensive training and control. In Jushiro's case, his patience is inherent.

"Your body language is equally powerful as your outside appearance" Shunsui added.

Kenpachi scowled at Shunsui. "What's the matter with Central 46? Are they idiots or blinds? Why did they overlook your skirt-chasing and drinking frolics?" A somewhat childish demeanor laced his tone.

"Oh don't hate me just because I'm handsome" Shunsui off-topic replied.

"Don't give the wrong ideas to your mentee"

Crap. Here comes another nightmare for Kenpachi. Things have gotten from worst to hell.

"Oh, Captain Kurotsuchi!" Jushiro greeted the creepy face-painted scientist of Gotei 13. He just invaded the room without even saying 'hello'. "What brought you here?"

Kenpachi scornfully looked at Mayuri . "How can those imbeciles at Central 46 missed a clown like you?"

"Be careful of your words, Kenpachi Zaraki" the mad scientist and captain of Second Squad warned. "Or you might end up on top of my dissecting table."

"Yeah, right! Why not start off with those morons at Central 46!" Kenpachi roared his displeasure, uncaring whether someone would hear his tirade against the powerful entity.

"Hmmmm…I'd sure take that into consideration" the Vice-President of the Shinigami Research and Development Institute stroked his chin with his long, blue fingernails.

"Anyway, what brought me here…is him." He pointed at Kenpachi. "The _vast_ opportunity that comes along with him"

"What do you mean?" Kenpachi could feel the hair at his nape stood up. His stomach tightens to a coil with how Mayuri is eyeing him. He feels like being autopsied alive.

"Do you want to get through lesson 2 using quick methods?" Mayuri retorted with a sinister laugh.

"Huh?"

"I have an experimental serum that would certainly catapult you to a degree of toastmaster"

"I'm not interested"

"How about undergoing a surgical procedure to hardcode everything directly into your brain?"

"No" Kenpachi's wary of the motive behind.

"How about considering a non-invasive download of information directly to your brain circuitry?"

"How about trying out all your ideas to yourself before selling it to me?"

"My intellect already surpassed every breathing organism here at Seiretei. I no longer need it."

"Why not go to Central 46 and try if your speeches and presentations can convince them to become your specimens?"

"Are you underestimating me?" Mayuri's voice is now dangerous. His sadistic behavior seems ready to unleash. "You clearly belong to the lowest of low lives. You have no understanding of the word help and gratefulness"

"How many times do I have to say, I do not need help from freaks like you?"

"You have no choice Zaraki Kenpachi! You are nothing but a dog which was ordered to wear a sweater!"

"Dammit! Then go ahead and tell your masters to wear a tail!"

Shunsui cleared his throat loud enough to catch the attention of the bickering captains of Gotei 13.

"Captain Kurotsuchi" Shunsui does not want any of Mayuri's outlandish experiments messed up the already peculiar situation but he needs to be discreet in rejecting the mad scientist's proposals. "We are truly grateful for your time. Rest assured we will keep your offers in mind just in case Captain Zaraki failed in his lessons"

"You gotta be kidding me!" Kenpachi blurted. "I'd razed Seiretei to ground if I have to in order to keep that freak show away from me!"

"Sounds promising" Mayuri ignored Kenpachi's outburst but instead focused on Shunsui's statement. The mad scientist left the room just the way he entered. No goodbyes.

Few moments fleeted in silence before Jushiro finally broke it. "You cannot fail, Kenpachi" his words despite it gentleness has an undertone of caution.

"I will NOT fail!" Kenpachi loudly announced. "I have raw desire to savor and to win any freaking battle. This is no exception. I will not lose."

Everyone in the room stared at Kenpachi as if pair of horns grew from his forehead. What a very uncharacteristic speech!

"So shall we start with the practice?" Jushiro asked.

"Practice, my ass!" Kenpachi's frustration is manifested in crisps expletives that followed. Finally, after so many beeps…beeps…and beeps due to the unprintable coarse language he mentioned, the battle-loving captain came to a halt. "The hell with my situation."

"It is not so bad" Shunshui's cliché strike again.

"Not so bad? Shit. It's like choosing between Love Marriage versus Arranged Marriage".

"Why is that?" Jushiro asked.

Kenpachi leaned on the chair. "It's like taking into consideration if suicide is better than being murdered."


End file.
